Exams.. the most dreaded event in my school years, very interesting how school arrange these horrible things in your life… What is the purpose? Make us study even when we’re supposed to relax? All the distractions, internet, social media are things that distract me from my so called ‘revision timetable’ Is it because our brains are always attracted to things we like doing??? Why can’t I just sit down, do a couple hours of studying and then relax for a bit? Why do I have to look at my phone every second even though nothing is happening? It’s frustrating because it’s so hard not to do it..
Even when I’m studying, I think about how much more I have to do, and how I’m never going to cover all of the syllabus before exams, I freak out, have a mental breakdown, and then back to Facebook.. 2 hours later, I’m still on Facebook, for some reason, forgot that I’m behind and continue until it’s time for me to sleep. Why can’t I be disciplined? Why is procrastination so powerful.. Our human minds in some situations are never in our favour.
I wish.. that I could love studying, I would embrace that everything I learn is to broaden my ‘horizon’, I wish I could think of school work as fun. But how can you love something when people around you hate it, it influences you to not like it either. The memes on Facebook, the messages of teenagers my age complaining about how school sucks, these all make me think that school is negative. People think school is a chore, but it’s really not.. I’ve thought about this lately, school is actually where you create most of your happy memories and experiences, you learn how to socialise, meet friends, go on school trips, complain about how bad your life is, make fun of teachers… There are actually a lot of good aspects of school. It’s not just a place of torture and education, it’s actually a place to get a taste of what society is like.
If you fail your internal exams at school, it’s not the end of the world. It’s a good mistake, and you can evaluate what you did wrong and improve your way of revision for the next set of exams. However, you only have a few of these chances before the real public exams come. Public exams are a whole different subject, they matter, they sculpt your future, that is what fears me the most. I haven’t done any yet, and the fact that it matters, scares me. When I look back at the previous exams, I regret not doing more work, regret procrastinating. However, when I’m revising now, I’m still doing the same thing. Is it because I’m used to it? Used to not working and suddenly have to start doing it on a daily basis? Why am I so lazy!!!!
It is going to be hard not to procrastinate, but I think of it as dieting. Dieting is hard at first, forcing yourself not to eat that bowl of french fries two inches away from you, but after a few weeks of perseverance, you start to get used to it, and that bowl of french fries doesn’t appeal that much to you. I think procrastination is a slightly worse version of dieting because it’s soooo hardddd!! Therefore, before I pick up my phone, before I decide to scroll on my feed on Facebook, I think twice. Is this going to benefit my future? Is it actually that important to miss out on the world’s irrelevant gossip on celebrities? Do I actually care about what the Kardashians are up to? The answer is often no, so I just.. stop.. 😛 (it’s actually not that easy, trust me)
Hope you enjoyed my rant post!!! Wish me luck in my exams! ♥♥♥
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